dandelionfiles

Did you miss me? I'm in the process of shutting down my MySpace account, mostly because Pros has made me completely paranoid that I'll never get a full time teaching job if I have one. Therefore, I'll be moving things back to my Blogger account. So much has happened in the past couple of years, the greatest thing being the birth of my niece Gloria. Somehow, she lives up to that full of a name despite being only 10 months old.

I have missed the Dandelions.

The sun got a little dimmer yesterday, and I don't think it's going to be firing up any extra sunlight any time soon. I think that the sun is in mourning; Molly Ivins died yesterday.

I will miss her deeply. Her work was brilliant and beautiful. Molly's had a coping mechanism for dealing with social injustice that ought to be celebrated: "laugh -- it's so much better for you than crying or throwing up". So far, it's the only method I've found that makes life continue to be worth living with.

If an afterlife exists, it's obvious why the Management had to take Molly so soon. Obviously, God was jealous of all of the wonderful columns she waswriting. He must have felt she was wasting her talents upon us mere mortals. Like any good head hunter, He sought to rectify matters by hiring her as his personal reporter. All I know is that all evildoers in the underworld should beware--Molly's going to serve the Devil a new Hell.

It's time to issue another challenge to the writers on the Dandelions site. In honor of the Solstice, X-mas, Hanukkah, and all other hollidays we celebrate this time of year, I say it's time to honor an old Victorian tradition and polish our writing skills at the same time.

The Victorians believed that the time between Halloween and Christmas was significant because they felt that the border between the living and the dead was at its thinnest. For this reason, it was actually more traditional to tell ghost stories on Christmas Eve than Reindeer tales.

The challenge, therefore, is this: Write a post (not too long, of course--1,000 words or less, OK?) in which you depict a tale of horror fit to celebrate the shortest days of the year.

Promise, it'll make you feel good!

Lynx

*note: starfish is denying her engagement--which is fishy, because my source is pretty darned reliable. Hmmmm...however, in the interest of reporting the tooth and nothing but the tooth In the past, friends and I have tried to screen potential mates of Starfish's--you know, making sure the right number of heads are attached, they're not Republican, etc. It has long been my dream to one day view a new suitor while squinting my eyes, make a point of looking at his mouth, and scream loudly with abject abandon, "CHECK HIS TEETH"! at the top of my lungs whilst other friends in starfish's posse hold the poor sucker down, all the while laughing hysterically while Starfish plots vengence ("You'll get pregnant SOMEDAY, Lynx. JUST YOU WAIT"). For some reason, Starfish has refused to introduce the posse and me to possible suitors for a while. I wonder why?)


ANYHOW, The CURRENT ENTRY. Gossip time is OVER.

Holiday weekends often inspire marathon movie watching. As a horror fanatic, I wanted to indulge all of the Halloween spirits I was too busy writing studies to enjoy during the actual holiday itself. Technically, I’m still in the right time of the year to be plugging good spooky stuff. According to the Victorians, spook season lasts from Halloween until Winter Solstice, anyway—with Ghost stories told on Christmas eve rather than Reindeer tales.

Of course, Halloween has passed, so I admit that I’m going to recommend the genre of horror that goes well with the cheeseballs and crackers of the season—cheesy horror, or horror with a side of humor. Here are three movies worth watching during this wacky weekend:

1. Slither—This little 2006 movie was underappreciated. Serenity fans will recognize Nathan Fillion, the commander of the now defunct series that should have gone on for much longer. He’s our lead hero here, mooning over lost childhood love, portrayed by Elizabeth Banks. That’s the romance angle—all movies have to have one, or else some horrific consequence too awful to contemplate occurs (having never seen one of these films without a romance of some sort, I don’t know what the awful thing is). Fortunately, this movie spares no expense at portraying slime and grossouts, so the romance can’t possibly make the movie too gushy.

The lead beastie is NOT following the current clichés, so fans can cheer while yelling “NO ZOMBIES OR VAMPIRES, HURRAH!” whilst saluting appreciation towards the creators. Instead, the menace is brought to earth through a meteor rock which hatches into an ancient species which infects whatever species are on a planet, breeds, and consumes it until everything is dead, whereupon it becomes yet another space meteor in search of new dining adventures. The beastie has a “hive mind” in which anything that is infected with it is instantly conscious of everything that any other infected thing can perceive as well as has full access to everybody’s memories, knowledge, and skills.

2.Shawn of the Dead—OK, OK, so zombies infect this flick. However, realize this flick is a few years old, hence, zombies were still new when it was originally conceived instead of the clichéd annoyances they are now. In fact, a lot of the current clichéd annoyances have tried to rip of this flick, as it was genuinely original and amusing to watch. There’s several layers of story here—a man finding his inner adult yet learning how to connect with his immature past constructively, a lost relationship he’s not ready to give up on, and a beer joint that he can consider his second home. Brilliant dialogue, laugh-out funny lines, and intelligent, thoughtful, quirky characters make this one a winner worth viewing again.

3. Tremors--yes, the original--it's the best one, after all--this one is the ORIGINAL cool horror flick in which people brilliantly work together to outwit mysterious wormlike people eating creatures who have decided the small town of Perfection, Nevada, which is geographically isolated from everything and four hours from help would make the perfect buffet dining meal. Kevin Bacon justifies his existence in this film. The writing is hip, amusing, the characters hysterical, eccentric, and altogether too much like relatives you won't admit to. If you have not seen Tremors, you have been cheated--this is worth watching, you get actual characters who think and plot and outsmart the monsters, and that's unique enough to make this one an all-time classic.

Have a great Turkey Day!

I wanted to give you an excuse for the reason I haven't been writing here--I've just finished my THIRD ethics committee set of forms for my THIRD and most complex study that I will be acting out in the near future.

Which is good news, because I really, really, need to finally get credit for stuff that I do, rather than write stuff, have folks publish it under their names, then completely ignore that I exist.

Not that I'm BITTER about that. OK, I AM. But, sigh, that's life, and I need to get over it.

Anyhow, I feel like Milgram's channelling through me, my last study is just so wicked. I am so proud. Devil horns even sprouted from my skull as I finished printing the thing out. Heh, heh, heh.

Wish me luck.